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Writer's pictureAngelia Kerling

Surviving Self-Doubt: A Heartfelt Guide for Young Women in Their 20s and 30s

Ah, self-doubt. That delightful voice that starts whispering nasty things in your ear during all your most important times. It’s like having an uninvited guest at a party who critiques your life choices while eating all your snacks (sucking up all your energy). If you’re battling this little monster, let’s face it with a touch of dark humor and a reality check.


Career Quicksand

Picture this: You’re at work, finally getting into a groove with all your responsibilities, and then—bam!—self-doubt comes along, whispering, “Oh, you think you’re cut out for this? That’s adorable.” It’s like getting a trophy for a job well done, only to have someone say it’s not a real trophy. You might wonder if you’re in the right career, or if the job you landed is only going to be yanked away later by some silly mistake you made. Spoiler alert: Sometimes, it’s less about being perfect and more about surviving the chaos with your sanity intact.


Relationship Pitfalls

Self-doubt doesn’t just stay in the office. It also lurks in your personal life, where it’s convinced you’re the sole reason your friendships and relationships resemble a soap opera. “Are you sure they like you, or are they just too polite to tell you to leave?” Self-doubt has a knack for making you question if you’re the problem, when in reality, everyone’s just trying not to lose their minds in this mess we call life.


Mental Health Mayhem

When self-doubt turns up the volume, it’s like a constant, nagging roommate who never does the dishes and always leaves the lights on. This mental intruder can transform stress into a full-blown circus, with anxiety and depression as the star performers. Remember, you’re not alone in this three-ring disaster—reach out for help before you end up juggling flaming swords of self-criticism.


Turning Down the Volume on Self-Doubt

  1. Spot the Saboteur: Recognize when self-doubt is creeping in. Challenge these thoughts by asking yourself if they’re actually helpful or just your inner critic having a field day. Sometimes, questioning the source of your doubts can help diminish their power.

  2. Acknowledge Small Achievements: Break your goals into smaller, more manageable steps and recognize your progress, no matter how minor it seems. Celebrating these small wins can build confidence and remind you that you’re making headway, even when it feels like you’re not.

  3. Lean on Your Support System: Surround yourself with people who offer genuine support and perspective. Friends who can laugh with you and offer encouragement can help counteract self-doubt. If needed, seek advice from those who know how to provide constructive feedback rather than just sympathy.

  4. Practice Self-Compassion: Accept that life is challenging and it’s okay to struggle. Self-compassion doesn’t mean you have to be overly positive; it means acknowledging that it’s normal to face difficulties and allowing yourself to be imperfect.

  5. Keep a Record of Your Successes: Maintain a log of your achievements, however small. This isn’t about self-congratulation, but rather about having a tangible reminder of your capabilities and resilience, which can be reassuring when self-doubt strikes.


Final Thoughts

Self-doubt might be the uninvited guest at your party, but you’re the one holding the guest list. Acknowledge its presence, make dark jokes about it, and then focus on if YOU'RE having a good time or not. Embrace the absurdity of life in your 20s and 30s commit to navigating the madness with as much humor and resilience as you can muster. You’ve got this.

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